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No matter how you put it, a divorce is an unpleasant and horrible thing. A family is being torn apart, and the spouses need to determine how they can sum up their marital life and legally put it behind them. When there are kids involved, the entire process can become even more complicated and stressful.

No matter what anyone tries to tell you, it is important to realize that not all divorces are created equal. You do have choices on how your divorce will happen and what type of negotiation process occurs. You need to understand the various processes so that you can decide which one is best for your needs.

Do-It-Yourself

Most states offer the option to log into an official state website and download a do-it-yourself divorce package. This type of service implies that a divorce is simply a matter of filling out some paperwork and sending in a check. Unfortunately, the process is not that easy.

What if whomever fills out the paperwork has made a mistake? If that has happened, then the paperwork will be sent back and you have to figure out what is wrong. What if you accidentally gave away all of your income to your spouse and then signed the document? Something like that could absolutely happen if you are not a lawyer and you are trying to file legal documents. A do-it-yourself divorce should never be an option.

Mediated Divorce

In a mediated divorce, the parties agree to use a third-party mediator to determine the terms of the divorce. This is usually used in a situation where there are significant marital resources that need to be divided up and neither party is willing to give up their claim. A mediated divorce can take time and become very expensive, but it remains a popular option with people who have a lot of money and property to lose.

Collaborative Divorce

The reality is that there are no tricks when it comes to filing for a divorce, unless you are using a do-it-yourself divorce and have no idea what you are doing. But if you and your spouse still have an amicable relationship, then a collaborative divorce is always the best approach.

In this type of divorce, the two parties hire attorneys and then each party drafts the terms for the divorce. Then the two parties start to exchange terms and a final agreement is reached. While this is an amicable way to draft a divorce, it is still done through attorneys with the spouses avoiding any type of communication directly. If you want to end your marriage on the best terms possible, then a collaborative divorce is the best way.

A Litigated Divorce

In most cases, one spouse wants a divorce while the other doesn't. In this instance, the party that wants the divorce must sue the other party to get what they want. This is a litigated divorce, and this is how most divorces in the United States occur.

As you can imagine, a litigated divorce can get very ugly and take a long time to be resolved. In some cases, the sides will eventually agree to a negotiation because the legal costs are getting prohibitive. But if both parties are willing to stand their ground, then the litigated divorce can leave large emotional scars that last a lifetime.

When an attorney says that they offer divorce services, that statement is much more broad than you may think. Filing for divorce can be a complicated process, even for people who think that they do not have much of an estate to fight over. As you talk to lawyers to try and find your perfect divorce attorney, there are a few other law fields you should ask about to make sure you are getting an attorney that can do the entire job for you.

Family Law

A divorce can get extremely complicated if there are children involved. The parent with custody may want to move out of state and the other parent won't allow it, or the status of the custody agreement may be challenged by one side or the other. Unfortunately, some battling spouses use the children as leverage in a divorce and it can be up to the attorneys to step in and act for the best interests of the children.

A divorce attorney needs to be an expert on family law, and that attorney needs to understand how important timing can be. Either parent can file for custody whenever they want, but the advantage in a custody case can sometimes go to the parent who has an attorney who knows the importance of making the first move.

Estate Management

Divorces involving children can get messy, but divorces involving money and property can get downright personal. Each state has their own laws regarding the marriage estate of a couple, and you need an attorney who knows those laws inside and out to preserve your rights and allow to keep property that is yours.

Some of the worst divorce horror stories people hear are about estate battles, and most of those horror stories are true. That is why a good attorney is essential when you are filing divorce.

Wills & Trusts

In the wake of a divorce, one or both spouses may want to amend their wills to exclude their future ex-significant other. If the husband set up a trust for his wife when they were madly in love, then he may change his mind when the divorce starts going through. When you have money wills and trust accounts that could be part of a divorce, then your attorney needs to be an expert on them to get you the results you want.

Business Law

Some married couples start successful businesses together, and those businesses could become casualties of a divorce. One spouse may be part owner of a successful business, and the other spouse could be entitled to part of that business as a result of the divorce proceedings. If there is a business involved in your marriage in any way, then there needs to be an experienced attorney involved in your divorce.

A divorce lawyer is actually not a specialist, but rather a broad practitioner who is able to practice law in a variety of disciplines. If you do not have an attorney with a comprehensive understanding of all of the areas of law that are involved in a divorce, then you could stand to lose more than you had expected. When you search for your divorce attorney, be sure you find one who has all of the skills you need to get the job done right.

In many states, getting a divorce can be as simple as signing a piece of paper. Nevada is famous for its easy divorce laws, but that does not mean that a quick Las Vegas divorce is always the best answer. If you are going to go through a divorce, then you need to hire an attorney. The temptation to try and do it yourself and save the money is strong, but the amount of money you could lose if your divorce is not properly handled will seem like pittance compared to what you could lose if you are not careful.

Agreeable Spouses can Become Disagreeable Quickly

When you and your spouse first decide to divorce, you may decide to be amicable and get the process over quickly. But once an agreeable spouse has had time to think things over, they can become disagreeable very quickly. The change in mood may come out of spite for what the spouse feels has happened through the whole downfall of the relationship, or the other spouse may have found success since the separation and the spiteful spouse wants part of the new fortune. In any event, you need to have an attorney on your side who can protect your rights from a vengeful spouse.

The Process is not What You Thought it Would be

When you first told your friend you were getting divorced, he assured you that you can do it yourself by signing a couple of documents and filing it with the court. Aside from the dangers a spiteful spouse can create, the process is also not as simple as people make it out to be. Some people see a lawyer handle a divorce and think that it looks easy. But that lawyer has studied years to know how to file a smooth divorce, and that is why people hire attorneys to make sure that they do not lose everything in the process.

Your Spouse May Get a Lawyer Without Telling You

Even though you and your spouse agreed to get divorced without attorneys, that could change as your spouse does some research on the Internet and listens to their family and friends. A divorce is a legal proceeding and you should have an attorney representing your best interests throughout the process. The last thing you need is to try and save money by not hiring an attorney, only to find out that your spouse felt it was better for them to get legal guidance.

The Court May Demand That You Get a Lawyer

In matters like a divorce, there is no such thing as a lawyer going to court on your behalf once and then never coming back. Once you have been associated with an attorney, the court will require you to have that attorney present at all times. The court is basically protecting you from yourself by requiring you to have an attorney for the entire process.

When you and your spouse decide to get a divorce, you need to consider your best interests over everything else. If there are children involved, then you definitely want to do what is right for the children by hiring an attorney. The bold truth is that you need to hire an attorney for your divorce if you want to have your rights protected at all times.

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